After two promising job applications, I find myself waiting for word on whether or not I've been hired for the second week.

My money is slowly running out. While I'm now carefully watching how much I'm spending, I know it's not going to last for long. An appointment with my shrink looms one week from now, while my cell phone bill has just arrived. I can actually afford to pay both, but they're going drain a lot out of me.

Just three weeks ago, I managed to sell one of my card game decks to a friend who works in one of the gaming stores I frequent, making quite a tidy sum. Sadly, the money didn't last very long, but it did delay what is now becoming more and more inevitable.

Inspired by that experience, as well as the discovery that the Philippines now has its own EBay site, I've decided to sell my old comics and my Magic: The Gathering cards.

Looking back, both have been the source of many fond, fond memories, recollections of childhood and dreaming about wonderful and epic adventures.

But the funny thing is that I've few or even no real attachements to my comics and cards, despite that now. In fact, the idea of selling them was practically a welcome one, as it could potentially give me money and allow me to clear out stuff from my house and make more room for other things.

Is this a sign of me finally growing up?

Well, my time with Magic is over...

As for comics, what stopped me from collecting and reading them a long time ago was the inanity of how story continuity and believeability was maintained in them. My tastes have since changed and grown more stringent. Comic book series, in my experience, usually go way out there in terms of storyline and concept. And yet, they rarely offer something deep, insightful, wonderful, or intelligent.

I guess my decision to sell them is also because I've come to despise the "collectibility" aspect of comics, promising its readers rewards in the future based on its rarity, age and value. (Pure bullshit. Going through current trading prices, I'll be lucky if I can even recoup what I spent on the comics in the first place!)

It's also because I hate how comic books can only occupy you for 30 minutes at most. For the same price, or maybe at least 3 times that much, I can get a book which will occupy me at least for a day, or maybe a week, or two weeks.

Now, don't get me wrong. I don't hate all comics or comics per so. In my bookshelf you will find two Blacksad books, Volume 6 of the Collected Omaha the Cat Dancer, DC Comics' Kingdom Come trade paperback, Wildstorm Studios' Danger Girl TPB, Arnold Arre's After Eden graphic novel, Marvel's Spider Girl TPB and a few individual issues of that series focusing on specific events in her life. What makes these gems different from the crap I used to collect is the continuity, consistency and quality of the writing and/or (usually and) art they have as compared to the stupid cliches, overdone violence and gore, and outright bizarreness of the comics I used to collect.

OK, now that the topic's raised, yes, I guess I still do collect comics. But even that has been mightily tempered by experience and taste. I now collect simple one-shots with a focused storyline capable of standing on its own, even if the book is part of a larger series; eg. trade paperbacks and graphic novels. No more hassles of collecting or keeping up with the latest developments and issues. No more extremely out-of-this world continuities that just get more and more convoluted with each issue, month, year, etc. that passes.

Damn, I am growing up.

On one hand, I'm finally letting go of my "things of youth". On the other, I'm only taking and keeping the things that really matter.

Yep.

BTW, please forgive me for the bitter tone with which I speak.

So, I now find myself trying to appraise my own wares (the covers of my comics are all slightly worn thanks to me being more a reader than collector), while finding potential customers. My comics, based on the current and latest prices, just aren't worth much, but hopefully I can get back what I spent.

As for my cards, the good news, it seems, is that I've got a lot of stuff that potentially will be easy to sell and may promise a nice return as well.

Having let Magic go, I now keep finding stuff which I know is in demand, and with the popularity of old cards becoming stronger and stronger, I know I stand a good chance of selling many of my cards. Had I chosen to cling on longer to my Magic, no doubt I'd have less wanted cards to sell. But my time there is over.

My dad has this thing of throwing everything out when there's too much clutter, while I grew up a pack rat, keeping junk for sentimental value or for the simple reason that I potentially could find use for an object in the future. But now, I find myself becoming just like him.

I'm growing up.

It's time to let go.

Hope I make some good cash.